The Adventure of the Stream of Thought
With no obvious topic coming to mind this week I thought I'd attempt something different: go for a walk and record my stream of thought. Right now I'm walking across the field near my house and realising it's quite chilly despite it being sunny. It's about 11 degrees which is really a sign that Autumn has arrived. The weather might be reasonable during the day but temperatures are dipping at night- the heating actually came on in my house last night and woke me up.
I'm not sleeping very well since going back to work. It's due to my dyspraxic mind. My brain processes information slowly and come bedtime it's analyzing the day that's ending and planning for the one ahead. This is not conducive to falling asleep. I had started to develop the ability to reign it in but with my new job role starting this week I've suddenly got a lot to think about and my sleep is the first victim of this new regime.
My HLTA role started this week and it went better than I could have ever imagined to be honest. I've taught several different classes and the results have been really rather good. I'm kind of pleased that I had a good start- I know it's not going to remain so straight forward and positive but I like to think I'll always be able to look back on these first few days and think 'yes, I can do this' and it will all be OK.
The start of the new term has also become the chance for me to improve a few other areas of my life. Despite now having longer working hours, I'm determined to go for a walk when I get home every day whether I have hit my 10,000 step target or not. This is partly because the extra exercise it will give me is good but also because if I have any chance of reaching the 1000 miles required for my challenge this year then I really need to step it up a gear.
Another thing I want to do is up my journal writing and make sure I am writing nearly every day. I consider myself like a modern day Samuel Pepys and imagine in a few hundred years scholars will be looking through my journals and understanding everyday life in the early 21st century. On a personal level it's quite good too; it actually gives me a chance to analyse the day myself instead of leaving it for my brain to do when I am supposed to be asleep. Also, now I've been keeping a journal for a good few years, it's quite nice to occasionally flick back through. I like to think when I'm retired, I will have this record from my twenties and hopefully beyond of what my life was like.
My other goal is to see more films at the cinema. With the nearest cinema being about fifteen miles from home, it becomes inconvenient to go. My workplace is not too far from a cinema and with my new hours it will actually be quite convenient to go after work. I always feel frustrated when there's films I want to see but end up never watching. I've got a few upcoming films I'm looking forward to. The first is Ad Astra, a realistic sci-fi film starring Brad Pitt, then there's Joker with Joaquin Phoenix as Batman's clownish adversary. There's also Lucy in the Sky which is another sci-fi film- this one is by Noah Hawley who writes some unusual but brilliant TV shows like Fargo and Legion. The other one is Jojo Rabbit which sees Taika Waititi write and direct and also play an imaginary friend version of Hitler- it's an anti-hate satire and sounds absolutely crazy. All four have been well received at film festivals.
I've just had to pause my recording for a moment to negotiate some unexpectedly open manholes and then cross a busy road. I've now reached the lovely tranquility of the River Avon. The sky is blue, the water is clear and the reeds are a lovely bright green colour. There's birdsong all around which will come out in the audio recording but as I'm typing this up you cannot hear it. Just imagine some tweets and chirps. There's something about rivers I find supremely relaxing. The calm flow, the birdsong and the lack of people make it so peaceful.
In recent years medical professionals have begun to understand that being out in nature is really good for us. I suppose historically everybody did it- the world was far less urban. These days even if you live in a suburban area you probably don't get out into the countryside that much. I'm so pleased that I do because it does wonders- there's always something different to see and it clears my mind and calms me down. I also feel better when I'm out in nature. On parts of the NHS, such as Scotland, you can actually be prescribed time in nature which sounds like a wonderful idea to me.
I just randomly had a thought about a news story I saw. Over in Brazil the Mayor of Rio de Janerio has attempted to ban an Avengers comic book as it shows two male characters, Wiccan and Hulkling, kissing. He reckons it should be in a bag so that 'innocent children' can't see it. It's quite disturbing that a political leader of a city the size of Rio can be elected with views like that. There's nothing inappropriate about the comic book; the pair are in a long-term relationship and are depicted fully clothes- it's in no way sexualized. It's not gone his way though as a judge has ruled he can't ban it, the comic book sold out and the image even appeared on the front of a national newspaper. Far more people have seen it because he tried to ban it. To me, it's amazing people still have the attitudes of homophobia, racism and sexism. Perhaps it's the way I was brought up but I don't believe that people are different because of their sexuality, race or gender.
In other news, I'm enjoying the plight of Boris Johnson, a man who should never have become prime minister yet inexplicably holds that position. The opposition have done a fantastic job since the summer break of making him look really stupid, though admittedly it's not that difficult. How long he will remain prime minister is something of an unknown but it's not looking like it will be very long. He's making statements like he'd rather be 'dead in a ditch' than ask the EU for an extension to Brexit. The opposition are establishing a law which means he will have to ask for an extension or could end up in prison if he ignores it. UK politics at the moment is like a well-written TV show with no-one able to predict what will happen in the next episode.
I've just been thinking about how different I feel to how I used to be. I would never say I'm a confident person but I'm significantly more confident than I once was. In the early days of this blog I was struggling to get a job and undergoing loads of interviews. I look back at those and realise I could probably sail through most of them now. I've got the confidence I didn't have then. On one particular interview which I discussed here at the time (see here), where part of it involved me being sent into a textiles lesson and asked to support the students. I didn't get the job because of that section of the interview. Maybe that would still let me down- how could I support teenagers sewing when I lack any sewing ability. The difference would be that I'd point it out to the interviewer. I'd calmly accept I didn't get the job but I'd give feedback. 'I found that part of the interview process inappropriate- how was I supposed to show my skills as a teaching assistant when no teaching took place when I was in the room? Put me in an academic subject and I can help learning happen but textiles, really?' I'm actually really glad I didn't end up working in that school- I don't think I'd have got on with them.
I've just checked and found that I now have some twenty minutes of audio to transcribe so I'm suspecting that this is quite a lengthy blog post. (I ended up cutting quite a few little chunks and a comprehensive analysis of the Women's US Open final). I think I am going to finish here. Hopefully this has ended up as something vaguely coherent and dare I say even entertaining? Thank you for reading and I may well do this again if it turns out alright. We shall see...
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| Artist's Impression of the walk (OK, it wasn't that cold) |
My HLTA role started this week and it went better than I could have ever imagined to be honest. I've taught several different classes and the results have been really rather good. I'm kind of pleased that I had a good start- I know it's not going to remain so straight forward and positive but I like to think I'll always be able to look back on these first few days and think 'yes, I can do this' and it will all be OK.
The start of the new term has also become the chance for me to improve a few other areas of my life. Despite now having longer working hours, I'm determined to go for a walk when I get home every day whether I have hit my 10,000 step target or not. This is partly because the extra exercise it will give me is good but also because if I have any chance of reaching the 1000 miles required for my challenge this year then I really need to step it up a gear.
Another thing I want to do is up my journal writing and make sure I am writing nearly every day. I consider myself like a modern day Samuel Pepys and imagine in a few hundred years scholars will be looking through my journals and understanding everyday life in the early 21st century. On a personal level it's quite good too; it actually gives me a chance to analyse the day myself instead of leaving it for my brain to do when I am supposed to be asleep. Also, now I've been keeping a journal for a good few years, it's quite nice to occasionally flick back through. I like to think when I'm retired, I will have this record from my twenties and hopefully beyond of what my life was like.
My other goal is to see more films at the cinema. With the nearest cinema being about fifteen miles from home, it becomes inconvenient to go. My workplace is not too far from a cinema and with my new hours it will actually be quite convenient to go after work. I always feel frustrated when there's films I want to see but end up never watching. I've got a few upcoming films I'm looking forward to. The first is Ad Astra, a realistic sci-fi film starring Brad Pitt, then there's Joker with Joaquin Phoenix as Batman's clownish adversary. There's also Lucy in the Sky which is another sci-fi film- this one is by Noah Hawley who writes some unusual but brilliant TV shows like Fargo and Legion. The other one is Jojo Rabbit which sees Taika Waititi write and direct and also play an imaginary friend version of Hitler- it's an anti-hate satire and sounds absolutely crazy. All four have been well received at film festivals.
I've just had to pause my recording for a moment to negotiate some unexpectedly open manholes and then cross a busy road. I've now reached the lovely tranquility of the River Avon. The sky is blue, the water is clear and the reeds are a lovely bright green colour. There's birdsong all around which will come out in the audio recording but as I'm typing this up you cannot hear it. Just imagine some tweets and chirps. There's something about rivers I find supremely relaxing. The calm flow, the birdsong and the lack of people make it so peaceful.
In recent years medical professionals have begun to understand that being out in nature is really good for us. I suppose historically everybody did it- the world was far less urban. These days even if you live in a suburban area you probably don't get out into the countryside that much. I'm so pleased that I do because it does wonders- there's always something different to see and it clears my mind and calms me down. I also feel better when I'm out in nature. On parts of the NHS, such as Scotland, you can actually be prescribed time in nature which sounds like a wonderful idea to me.
I just randomly had a thought about a news story I saw. Over in Brazil the Mayor of Rio de Janerio has attempted to ban an Avengers comic book as it shows two male characters, Wiccan and Hulkling, kissing. He reckons it should be in a bag so that 'innocent children' can't see it. It's quite disturbing that a political leader of a city the size of Rio can be elected with views like that. There's nothing inappropriate about the comic book; the pair are in a long-term relationship and are depicted fully clothes- it's in no way sexualized. It's not gone his way though as a judge has ruled he can't ban it, the comic book sold out and the image even appeared on the front of a national newspaper. Far more people have seen it because he tried to ban it. To me, it's amazing people still have the attitudes of homophobia, racism and sexism. Perhaps it's the way I was brought up but I don't believe that people are different because of their sexuality, race or gender.
In other news, I'm enjoying the plight of Boris Johnson, a man who should never have become prime minister yet inexplicably holds that position. The opposition have done a fantastic job since the summer break of making him look really stupid, though admittedly it's not that difficult. How long he will remain prime minister is something of an unknown but it's not looking like it will be very long. He's making statements like he'd rather be 'dead in a ditch' than ask the EU for an extension to Brexit. The opposition are establishing a law which means he will have to ask for an extension or could end up in prison if he ignores it. UK politics at the moment is like a well-written TV show with no-one able to predict what will happen in the next episode.
I've just been thinking about how different I feel to how I used to be. I would never say I'm a confident person but I'm significantly more confident than I once was. In the early days of this blog I was struggling to get a job and undergoing loads of interviews. I look back at those and realise I could probably sail through most of them now. I've got the confidence I didn't have then. On one particular interview which I discussed here at the time (see here), where part of it involved me being sent into a textiles lesson and asked to support the students. I didn't get the job because of that section of the interview. Maybe that would still let me down- how could I support teenagers sewing when I lack any sewing ability. The difference would be that I'd point it out to the interviewer. I'd calmly accept I didn't get the job but I'd give feedback. 'I found that part of the interview process inappropriate- how was I supposed to show my skills as a teaching assistant when no teaching took place when I was in the room? Put me in an academic subject and I can help learning happen but textiles, really?' I'm actually really glad I didn't end up working in that school- I don't think I'd have got on with them.
I've just checked and found that I now have some twenty minutes of audio to transcribe so I'm suspecting that this is quite a lengthy blog post. (I ended up cutting quite a few little chunks and a comprehensive analysis of the Women's US Open final). I think I am going to finish here. Hopefully this has ended up as something vaguely coherent and dare I say even entertaining? Thank you for reading and I may well do this again if it turns out alright. We shall see...
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