The Adventure of 2020

As 2020 limps through it's final days, we've reached the point where I reflect on what the past year has been like for me. As we keep hearing endlessly at the moment, it's been a year like no another (though I suspect anyone who lived through the Spanish 'flu pandemic of 1919 or most of the middle ages who argue differently). 

Things began fairly normally, with the vague notion of a nasty bug somewhere in China that we'd never heard of being mentioned on the news occasionally. I returned to work after the Christmas holidays and quickly life began to get tricky. I found myself in ever more stressful scenarios and my mind struggled to cope with this to an extreme I'd never quite experienced before. The anxiety and stress even began to make me physically ill as my immune system began to fight the trauma that it assumed must be coming from. 

Then suddenly Boris Johnson popped up to talk about something other than Brexit for the first time. Covid-19 had arrived in the UK and it turned out it was much more serious than we'd been made to believe at first. Everyone was told to stay at home and I found myself in the weird position of being quite happy about it. Sure, there was the same general sense of fear and uncertainty that I think most people felt but the timing couldn't have been more perfect for me. Lockdown was just what I needed. 

Sure, I missed people but for the most part I enjoyed being at home. We were still allowed to go for a walk every day and it was Spring and the perfect time to do that. I loved spending time in nature and watching wildlife, from the swans battling floods and egg-stealing rats to the nest of blue tits I discovered in a tree. It was a slower pace of life that I loved. I did do the odd days work supporting students whose parents were classed as key workers but on the whole I felt very lucky to be in the position of being paid and having a secure job whilst not actually having to do a great deal. 

As the year went along I became increasingly frustrated at the government's ineptitude. I think like many I was prepared to give them the benefit of the doubt- no-one knew quite how to deal with a pandemic. But after a while it appeared that the government would never seem to learn from it's experiences. Johnson would state something as a categoric fact and then within a few days would turn around a few days later and say the opposite. This happened time and time again and basically for the latter half of the year became the normal practice of this government. Advice became more and more absurd from pubs forced to close at 10PM as if Covid only comes out at night and a minister saying a scotch eggs now count as substantial meals. We can't forget when Dominic Cummings made an a ridiculous trip to Barnard Castle and was defended robustly by the government which then couldn't understand why the following week everyone was ignoring the same guidance as Cummings and were crowded around on the beaches. 

Over the summer I worked hard on training, preparing for the 26 mile walk I'd foolishly signed up for. I walked through valleys and woods and along pebbled beaches, gradually increasing the length. In September the day finally came and I found myself walking 26 miles around Salisbury. Despite all my training it was still really tough thanks to challenging terrain and my body rebelled for the final third. Every part of me was in agony yet somehow I still managed to finish. In a year where I haven't done a great deal, completing that challenge and raising nearly £400 for the Alzheimer's Society in the process still feels like a huge achievement. 

Returning back to work in September after not really working properly since March felt quite daunting. I found myself with new challenges and working with new colleagues. The worry that my anxiety would continue just as it left off loomed over me for most of the summer but incredibly it didn't come back. I think perhaps the long break gave me time to process what was going on in my head and I'd worked on strategies to deal with it. It also helped that it turned out I was working in on of the loveliest teams I'd ever been a part of. In the end the term was fantastic and I enjoyed my job more than I think I've ever done before and it's been so special watching the student's progress in front of my very eyes. 

Throughout the Autumn I began looking into owning my own home more seriously than I'd done before and suddenly I was viewing flats and then had put an offer on one. It was all very stressful but on the very last day of term I zoomed straight off from work to pick up my keys. I am now a homeowner. I will write more about this week in the coming weeks but at the moment I'm just finding it a little weird. There's something so empowering about having my own space and it feels like a proper achievement to have reached the position where I'm able to afford to own my own home. 

It feels like we're supposed to say this has been an awful year and sure, the pandemic has been scary and unpleasant in countless ways. But for me it's actually been quite good. I feel like I have managed tp push past some of my mental barriers in a way I'd never thought possible. I walked 26 miles in a day and raised nearly £400 by doing so. I moved into my own home. 

It's easy to end this year and think it was terrible but there's so much that we can all look back on and be proud of. We all faced challenges we never thought we'd have to face and we worked out how to deal with them. Many of us were given the privilege of spending more time with our families. Many of us were able to connect with nature and there was a sense of community that I'd never felt before. I think that in this year of adversity we've seen the very best that humanity has to offer and it's been incredible to be part of.