The Adventures of Dysfunctional Dan

A few weeks ago I discussed the bucket list I created back when I was sixteen and recounted some of the items I have already ticked off. Today it's time to tell the story of the remaining things that I've managed to do in my life so far. In at number 24 is "sing to an audience", something which I long since ticked off though it stretches some definitions. 'Sing' can apparently be defined as 'make musical sounds with the voice' which is not exactly my forte. I've not got a musical bone in my body and it's not helped by the fact I've got quite a deep voice, meaning your average song is at least an octave higher than I can actually reach. 'Audience' is defined as "the assembled spectators" and a school assembly neatly fits that. I can't remember a great amount of the details of this one but somewhere around 2010 or 2011 I found myself stood in front of a school of primary children singing. I honestly can't recall w...

It's time for my annual look at this year's nominees for Best Picture at the Oscars and my attempt to predict which one is going to win. Last year I failed hopelessly but I have a feeling I'm going to be more successful this time around... 1917 Sam Mendes' First World War flick may not be the most exciting film in terms of plot but it's one of the best made films of this year's nominees, if not of all time. The film is made to look like it was filmed in one camera shot which is a huge technical challenge. The technique has been used by filmmakers before but never on a film of such a huge scale. The young stars George MacKay and Dean-Charles Chapman spent months rehearsing in order to make the style work but it also means their performances have been perfected. 1917 is a war film that will captivate everyone, even those who would say they don't like war films, and is my pick for this year's winner. Ford Vs Ferrari This one is perhaps the mos...

Last week I had the pleasure of seeing Sandi Toksvig live. Her show was lovely, funny and uplifting in a way I've not seen anyone do before. Part of what she did was talk to members of the audience about their moment as a National Trevor, named when one of her friends misunderstood the phrase "National Treasure". The idea was that everyone has moments of fame to one extent or another in their life and she talked to people who had appeared in the press at one time or another. I thought it might be fun to share my National Trevor moment... I grew up as a member of various animal charity's kids clubs from the RSPCA to the RSPB and the Wildlife Trusts. When I was about eleven or twelve the local wildlife trust ran a writing competition. They asked for short stories which had a theme of sustainability and I immediately had what I knew was an excellent idea featuring some loggers in a rainforest. All I needed was a suitable animal to star in my story so I endured the...

Back when I was sixteen I created a bucket list. I'm sure you know that a bucket list is a list of things you want to do before you die or 'kick the bucket'. The list is not something I've given a lot of thought for some years but over the festive period I stumbled upon it again. At the start of a new decade I thought now would be a good time to start ticking some more things off. The list itself is quite eclectic. In re-launching it, I've edited it a little, removing some things that twelve years on I consider less a life goal and more things I'm really not that keen on doing. Why, for example, was sixteen year old Dan keen to go on the world's biggest roller-coasters? Grown-up Dan has been on plenty of roller-coasters in his lifetime and hasn't really enjoyed any of them. The full list can be viewed here if you want to take a look. Whilst the whole point of a bucket list is to complete it across a whole lifetime, I'm going to attempt to make 2...

Happy New Year one and all! For my first blog post of 2020 I thought I'd take a look back at 2019, specifically my 2019. I began the year with a challenge, to walk one thousand miles over the course of 2019. These had to be 'boots on' miles, i.e. miles I walked when specifically going out walking rather than counting up the distance I walk. I always knew it would be a challenge but one I had the potential to achieve. Unfortunately I only managed 946 miles over 2019. I say 'only' but it's still a hell of a lot and probably more than I'd have managed had I not attempted the challenge. It became clear towards the end of November that I was going to fall a little way short of the total and I did worry I'd see it as a failure and be hard on myself at the end of the year. I'm certainly disappointed but actually walking that far is still a good achievement. I also get so much joy from being outside, partly because I get clean air and vitamin D and al...

We're approaching the end of 2019 and so it is time for the annual tradition where I share some of the things I've enjoyed the most this year. I say "annual tradition" but this is only the second time I've done this. I suppose the act of writing this is making it an annual tradition. TV It occurs to be that I haven't loved much TV this year. I've never watched Game of Thrones  which is probably just as well because it seems most people were disappointed in it's final season. The second series of Killing Eve was enjoyable but no-where near the heights of it's first series and the first version of The War of the Worlds  that actually set the story in the 19th century was a bit of a mess.  Still, there have been some good things. One of them is the BBC's His Dark Materials  which has turned Philip Pullman's excellent novels into something really special. There's a wonderful cast with Dafne Keen as Lyra and the CGI in it is stun...

I sit behind the keyboard waiting for inspiration for a blog post. Suddenly a figure appears before me. A bright lights shines from it's head, almost blinding me. As my eyes adjust to the light, I realise the figure keeps shifting form. One moment it's a young girl, then suddenly an old man, then a head without a body, constantly shifting and never settling as one thing. "I am the Ghost of Christmas Past" the figure announces and if I didn't know better I'd say it had delivered the line with a sense of pride. "Long past?" I inquired. "No. Your past" "But I like Christmas, I don't need saving." I tell the spirit. "True. But you do need content so let us travel back to your past". The room fills with bright light and then fades again but I'm no longer in the same place. I'm now in a crowded dining room and a group of people are sat around the table eating Christmas dinner. I instantly recognise my p...